As the old year ends and the new one begins, once again I \u201cdrenched\u201d myself in promises.
\nAlongside the usual \u201cI\u2019ll exercise\u201d and \u201cI\u2019ll eat healthier,\u201d a new one appeared:
\n\u201cI will learn not to hold back a kind word.\u201d<\/p>\n
Even as I put this promise in my mind, I accompanied it with the thought: \u201cWell, this one will be easy to keep,\u201d and if I struggle with \u201cbody workouts\u201d or \u201crestraining indulgent treats,\u201d at least I can give someone a plus for this.<\/p>\n
Then the year began. And that easiest promise\u2014compared to going to the bathroom\u2014started buzzing in my head: \u201cTime to act.\u201d<\/p>\n
I walked through the beautiful routine of everyday life. I soaked up little moments of kind service, beautiful gestures, unexpected efforts, and helpful intentions. And when the time came to praise and set off that fireworks of kind words NOW, while the person was still there\u2026 it often ended in nothing. I stayed silent like a fish:
\n\u201cAh, well, whatever\u2026\u201d
\n\u201cHow will I come across?\u201d
\n\u201cHow to start?\u201d
\n\u201cNot this, not that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
And the words, already perched on the tip of my tongue, slipped away unspoken.
\n\u201cMaybe next time\u2014when we meet again, at the right moment, I\u2019ll say it,\u201d I would soothe my own muteness.<\/p>\n
But realizing the year was moving in giant strides and my program hadn\u2019t budged from zero\u2026
\nI decided to try harder.
\nBecause\u2026 what would I tell myself at the year\u2019s end?
\nThat not only did I eat sweets and walk less than I could, but also didn\u2019t accomplish the \u201ceasy\u201d promise?<\/p>\n
Once, at my Pilates class (yes! According to my promise, I go), I noticed the instructor.
\nBeautiful! No makeup, yet such a lovely face! Athletic! Pleasant! Radiating calm.
\nI gawked. Admired how effortlessly and lovingly she demonstrated everything.
\nAfter class, in the locker room, we met:
\n\u201cCome on, V.,\u201d I nudged myself\u2014something inside stubbornly silent like a goat.
\nFinally, I gathered myself and praised her. Said what had been perched on my tongue.<\/p>\n
Her cheeks flushed, but she walked away so happy. Such a long smile across her face that I smiled too.
\nBecause the feeling of not swallowing a kind word is so good.<\/p>\n
In the summer, I popped into a fast-food place and saw the cashier. Her hand was tied at the wrist, yet she worked at the register, packaging food like a little bee. I noticed her manicure. Though her hand was \u201cin a cast\u201d to the fingertips, the nails were neat, freshly done.
\nI paid. Something inside nudged: \u201cSay it!\u201d
\nI stayed silent. Gathered my food.
\n\u201cSpeak!\u201d\u2014something pinched me.
\nAnd I finally said:
\n\u201cYour manicure is so lovely. It\u2019s wonderful when a woman takes care of herself even when she could skip it.\u201d<\/p>\n
How surprised she was! How happy I left her! How good the feeling I carried with the food bag!
\nI could have stayed silent\u2014but how good it felt to speak.<\/p>\n
Today, Mykolas went to kindergarten.
\nClutching a bucket of berries and announcing his usual morning line, \u201cI\u2019m the only one,\u201d he went to celebrate a birthday.
\nA happy mood. But I knew my child wouldn\u2019t accept anything that \u201cdidn\u2019t belong\u201d to him.
\nDuring birthdays, the celebrants are \u201ccrowned\u201d with a year-marking crown.
\nThe teacher sends a photo.
\nIn the picture, Mykolas sits with a crown.
\nWhat???
\nZooming in, I see the teacher also has a crown, holding Mykolas on her lap, almost hidden.
\n\u201cGod,\u201d I thought.
\nMy heart tightened with a reminder: don\u2019t hold back.<\/p>\n
Considering Mykolas\u2019s first weeks at kindergarten and the teachers\u2019 efforts to make him feel as comfortable as possible, I take a few minutes out of my day to write to the kindergarten director.<\/p>\n
The heartfelt joy that came back!
\nHow happy she was that her efforts weren\u2019t assumed to be \u201cjust natural,\u201d that she didn\u2019t get credit automatically.<\/p>\n
Long story short?
\nI thought it would be easier.
\nMy program \u201cdon\u2019t hold back a kind word\u201d is underway.
\nIncredible, but it\u2019s easier to lift my legs and reach for goodies than to praise when I already feel there\u2019s reason.
\nI\u2019m moving forward. But with a firm kick to my own butt.<\/p>\n
The finale:<\/p>\n
Much in life can be written under \u201ctaken for granted.\u201d
\nBut the further I go, the more I realize that a kind word, written in clean handwriting, works wonders.
\nIf we thought it was nice, felt it was good,
\ntouched someone with \u201cI care,\u201d
\ndon\u2019t hold it back in your hand. Don\u2019t leave it perched on the tip of your tongue.
\nAn unspoken compliment, sitting on the tongue, sparks a huge wave of good emotions.
\nAnd sometimes, a verbal hug works stronger than the tightest embrace.<\/p>\n
Sweetly,
\nTomorrow, be sure to look around,
\nYou\u2019ll definitely find someone to \u201chug\u201d with words.
\nV.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"template":"","class_list":["post-17780","istorija","type-istorija","status-publish","hentry"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/viktorijos.lt\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/istorija\/17780","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/viktorijos.lt\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/istorija"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/viktorijos.lt\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/istorija"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/viktorijos.lt\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17780"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}